‘Good Bye dadi, dada, nani, nana, dad,
mom, aunt, uncle, ramu kaka, chotu, browny (the family dog)…. ’ I said gasping
without taking a breath in between like kabadi kabadi .. as I boarded the just
started train and thanked God for the right departure of the train. I am that
kind of person who can’t take emotions for long and my family is exactly
converse. They wanted a whole 1 hour serial (without breaks) to happen on the
platform and the whole family came to bid adieu as though I am going to a
Kargil war!
The fact is I got through my graduation
at NIT, Jamshedpur in just four years without any backlogs which is a great
achievement to me and I was leaving for Trivandrum (otherwise known as
Thiruvananthapuram, like Mumbai from Bombay) for a 2-month training at the
company which hired me at campus placement. The college had bored me for 4
years and now this company was going to pay and bear me for ___ years, which
was apparently worse! I wonder when I’ll fill the above blank ;-)
It was a long long journey and I finally
reached T.drum the next day. I took an auto-rick which was again an hour
journey to the hotel where I was given accommodation by the company. The driver
was abusing traffic police which apparently I did not understand but gave back
a smile saying ‘ohh’. I wanted to give him the impression that I know the local
language, Malayalam little bit so that he won’t cheat me while taking the fare.
The hotel name ‘Highness Inn’ was
deceiving; I took it for a 3 star hotel if not a 5 star considering myself
being a fresher in the company. I got down from the auto after the driver
killed the engine and I was looking into the skies for the 3 star hotel. The
auto driver pointed his finger to a 2 storied mansion and looted 450 bucks from
me. Feeling more disgusted about the hotel, I did not bargain with him. I
entered the compound of the hotel to find a bar on the left, wine shop at the
right and finally the reception at the centre! Well something good, at least I
don’t have to go far to get the basic commodities. The receptionist (I want to
emphasize it’s a male) asked me for an identity and gave me the room keys. I
asked him if I could get warm water to take bath. He said ‘p~full hot water
saaru, 24 hours!’ in his typical Malayalam accent. I later got to know that
they give hot water for drinking also, not just at my hotel but in the entire
city! The drinking water was purple in colour and hot (but they say it’s warm)
which was nauseating (if you are a pregnant woman then you should consider it)
and therefore I got something to blame why I used to drink more chilled beer
than water ;)
Next day I slipped myself into a neatly
ironed trouser and shirt and took help from my roommate to knot the tie which
he did for the next 2 months! On some days after coming back from training, I
managed to remove the tie without losing the knot to reduce pain to him the
next morning. Back to those ragging days in college after which I never tucked
my shirt in nor wore a formal dress & black shoe!! ‘So this is it’ I
thought, ‘the end of immatureness and irresponsibility and a brand new start of
fcuking professionalism to get screwed professionally!’
The first day of training itself was lethargic
and the facilitators (as they say but I want to call them circus ring masters)
have uttered this word ‘professionalism’ so many times that I had a
professional nightmare that night. The first class which I can never forget was
taken by a faculty named Alpha (sounds like variables xyz! as though his dad
had a very few names to choose from in the entire world). He was a big psycho
and made us memorize all the names of 45 members of T45 batch (45 was just a
coincidence) in that hour with his circus games. Our names weren't as simple as
his (Alpha) to memorize easily; take for example my own name, ‘Nagapradeep
Chinnapalli’!! My batch mates must have had hell lot of time! ;-) But
the bright side of it was we could get to know each other quickly. Fortunately
there was no Beta and Gamma to take the next hours!
We were made to sit for 10 hours a day
on those supposed to be revolving chairs, that my credit card (which my aunt
lent me) in the wallet of my back pocket was bent (if not broken) and became
inoperative on the very first day that made me borrow money from others until I
got my first salary. Please don’t ask me the figures; it was again a sad story
as the salary was just more than my pocket money. Our facilitators asked us to
be grateful for getting paid to sit and listen to their torture (lectures).
Unlike in my college I found 50% of
trainees were girls. It was like 1 girl for every 1 boy; It was like 'Dil
Khush' for all the guys. My college had just 28 girls out of an
entire batch strength of 240. In NITs you don’t find hot girls and hot girls
usually don’t bother their grey matter. Hot girls with brains are dangerously
rare like uranium and if found are supposed to be kept safely in museums and
dealt with carefully as they are loaded with all sorts of weapon to make men
dance to their tunes! I wondered where these girls were at the time of
engineering! And from which college? And why was I not there? Nevertheless I
found them now! ;-) It was a feast for the eyes initially, which died
out eventually as they paired up one by one :-(
Without girls, any place is like a
black&white TV or a TV without cable connection or like food which is
bland. Girls are like masala in a curry which add aroma and taste. So the
masala girl in my ILP life enters with an introduction from a common friend
after a whole 1 month of training. ‘This is Preeti and Preeti, this is Naagaaa
pradeeep’ the common friend ending the introduction in a singing tone to
accentuate that I have got a long name! Common friends between boy and girl
should be isolated after this kind of formal introduction as they feel it’s
their birth right to be a part of every discussion, fun and decision between
them!!
Preeti was a local girl and unlike other
Kerala girls she had a long straight non-oily hair. It’s her trademark and she
can be spotted from any corner of the building because of that long hair. She
was a very tall girl, very childish and always carried a big smile on her face.
There was not even a single moment I saw her in a serious or bad mood. Cute
girls look more cute when they cry. No no I am not a psycho/saddist to see them
cry. But they are great opportunities to console them and score marks
;-) With this girl, I thought, I won’t be having such a chance. There was
this irritating guy (chicken me haddi types) in the class, one day sitting
right in between us and pestering her with various questions. His one stupid
question was what her parents do and why her surname was Subbalakshmi instead
of dad’s name. She smilingly replied which I overheard that her mom was no more
and she passed away just a year ago! And that’s what touched me. Despite that
fact; she was always seen happy. From that day I tried to stay with Preeti
Subbalakshmi for most of the time to learn to be happy. With her childish
behaviour like exchanging pens when writing, disturbing me from concentrating
to lectures (ironically she was the topper in her engg. college) and indulging
me to play silly classroom games, my professionalism went for a toss!
As I said earlier I was in serious trouble
with a failed credit card; one day I snatched 1000 bucks from her ‘ladies’ bag
like Gabbar Singh. Yeah, I am coming to that! The other items that were dumped
in the bag were a long yellow comb, a small mirror, some hair pins, colourful
stickers, kit-kat, room keys, potato chips, perfume spray, 2 creams (which
looked similar to me), hand-kerchief, no books and some other stuff ;-) I
learnt peeping into a ladies handbag (can be called a green room) was fun! The
next day morning she came and asked me for 20 bucks to have breakfast, which
was granted and the other day she asked me for 30 bucks to buy a tooth brush
for which I didn’t have! How can I make her believe that I have used all her
1000 Rupees for ‘life surviving fluids’ with roommates a night before ;-)
We had been good friends and bad enemies
also who can hurt each other’s ego equally. Like one day in canteen while she
was taking brown rice I commented ‘How can you eat such rice, big and brown; it
reminds me of bugs and insects.’ She said ‘how can you eat such small white rice;
it reminds me of ant eggs :P ’. This is the problem with ‘hot girls with
brains’; they answer back with wit. I felt like zipping her lips ;-) I
said ‘ok ok let’s not compare the food while we are eating’ myself going into a
defence mode. Whenever she denied accompanying me for lunch, dinner or movies;
I used to look straight up in the sky and scream ‘Subbalakshmi aunty! Your
daughter is not listening to me. Please make your daughter come with me, else
I’ll be bored’. She used to burst into laughter which was worth screaming like
that :-)
We used to have a Business English class
taught by Suja. She looked sexy, basically an Indian, born in Kenya, roamed
around continents and I simply didn’t get what she was doing at T.drum teaching
me or us! Most noticeable was her peculiar accent, feels like a talking
hardware was placed in her throat. I mean it sounded good and definitely better
than these call centre girls. The first class was on phonetics; she made us
yell them so loud, it reminded me of those days when I learnt alphabets in
kindergarten! On one day she asked us to go through any novel and narrate the
abstract in class. It was my turn and I gave a brief on Wright Brother’s
adventures to invent a plane. As I finished, my roommates cried foul saying it
was a comic and not a novel. I hardly have any interest in reading big novels,
so I got issued a comic book of 22 pages from library and I wondered when these
dick heads noticed that :( The hot phonetic teacher turned to me and said
‘jʊ wɪl hæv tuː peɪ fɔːr ðɪs (You will have
to pay for this)’. It sounded to me like a call centre girl romantically asking
‘Is there anything I can do for you Sir?’ ;-) I made a sheepish face and
fortunately she didn’t take any action later.
When we move closely with people for
long, we start liking them even if they are not so good looking. Instead of
asking ourselves ‘what’s good in him/her?’, we switch to ‘what’s bad in
him/her?’ The answer might be ‘NOTHING’ for both questions but we fall into a
self dug trap with the later question! Preeti and I used to spend lot of time
on phone as well, after coming back to respective hotels which were 30km apart.
On one day while talking on mobile phone she asked me to come near my window
and asked if I could see the moon? I replied ‘Yeah it’s a full moon, but what
are you trying to say?’ She said ‘We are so far, yet we are able to see a
common thing!’ Girls are romantic in their own ways! And to magnify it, my
brain always aids me ;-) I said ‘Yeah, so true but had I been an
astronaut, I would have placed a large mirror on the moon so that I can see
you!’ She burst into laughter. After few minutes of exchanging laughter I
cleared my throat and said ‘Preeti could you be serious for couple of minutes?’
She replied ‘Oh my God after such a big joke, how can I? Ok sorry, tell. What
is it?’ I didn’t know how she takes it, but I wanted to tell it. For I believe
if you love someone, express it. Or let me put it in a bitter way; if you
cannot express, don’t love! With all the gut feeling gathered, I just vomited
what I had been practising before mirror for many times!!
I like u …!
I’ll love u … if u like me !!
I’ll marry u … if u love me !!!
That’s it; She again burst into laughter
uncontrollably for the next 120 seconds and finally said ‘where did you copied
this dialogue from?’. Damn it was mine and original and it was for her! How can
I make her believe after such a question. I was waiting for an answer and not
questions!! Sensing that I was not laughing this time, she calmed down and said
‘I am speechless. That was a great one. Though sounded conditional, I know you
are trying to make it poetic and funny. I too like you Nags, but… (I wondered
who coined ‘but’) this relation can’t go any further. I have to marry a Mallu
guy, my dad gets for me. You will find a better girl definitely. I hope you
understand…’ I hanged the phone down thinking where to re-use my poem ;-)
The next 2 days weren’t normal but she
was one kind of a girl who tries to bring smile even on animals. That
essentially doesn’t mean that I am a beast. Just a week before her birthday, I
came to know about it. I had no clue how to make it special or even buy a gift
because I never gifted a girl. It doesn’t mean that I am Kanjus (miser)
but I never felt like gifting anyone till then! So I approached one of my batch
mates, a girl to get an idea. She suggested me to go for ear rings as it is
considered as a personal gift by girls. My next question to her was where I can
get some good pair. She said there are many jewellery shops near the railway
station! I said I can’t go there as it is very far, remembering the first day
when the auto driver looted me 450 bucks. ‘arey stupid it is just 1.5km from
your hotel, if you can’t walk, take a rick which shouldn’t cost you more than
20 bucks!!’ she exclaimed. What the fcuk! I was fooled like an illiterate. I
responded ‘forget the rick, I will take a walk and thank you so much’. After
exploring exhaustively all the shops to and fro, I settled for a pair of silver
ear rings with lavender colour stones studded on them. I just loved them and
patted my own shoulders for such a great selection, the very first time. I
gifted her on the birthday which she accepted (without nautanki!)
and even wore it the next day. She wore them on a matching top and looked
stunning. I had to search for the ear rings amidst her long hair. My batch mate
who has given the idea congratulated me saying ‘good going boss!’. But I knew
there was nothing great going to happen :-(
One day when Preeti left for her home, I
tried to call her on mobile but the routes were busy. So I called her home
landline only to hear her dad take the call. Feeling a bit scared I asked ‘umm,
this is Nagapradeep; can I speak to Preeti, Uncle?’ like a studious guy. He
replied ‘Oh Nagapradeep! She left for her sister’s house. Take this landline
number if you are unable to reach her on mobile.’ I thanked him and wondered
about the tone he was speaking (‘Oh Nagapradeep!’), as though he knew me from
ages! I dialled the landline number he gave and this time it was her sister who
took the call. I thought this idiot, Preeti must be a lazy bone to attend the
calls! I again repeated the same question but this time friendly and not
studiously. She replied ‘Oh Nagapradeep! Yeah she is there. Umm.. It was you
who gifted the ear rings right? They are really pretty, nice selection!’. I
felt the sarcastic tone in the compliment and that she was trying to pull my
leg! This idiot had shown the ear rings to her sister and dad also! Amazing! I
used to pester her to take me her home and treat me with home food. Now I won’t
ask her anymore as her family knew the entire drama! Anyways I wanted to take
the chance and pull her legs back. So I replied ‘Thank you! You must be Deepti
Subbalakshmi, Preeti’s elder sister right? You have studied medicine, you are a
doc; you made a love marriage and it was you who proposed your husband in the
1st year of college, right?’ That’s it; she banged the phone down, ran away to
call her sister and Preeti took my call ;-) Thanks to Preeti who used to
get candid and tell me all about her family.
Preeti and I were posted to different
locations; I in Mumbai and she in Bangalore. Even if I was posted to Bangalore,
it would not be of much help as she was a daddy’s girl and was very firm to
listen to her dad and marry a lungi (dhoti) wearing Mallu guy with tummy and
curly-oily hair :P .. So be it! The last day I started missing the
training centre, the faculty and the batch mates. It was quite shocking to see
people of other batches weeping at the railway station. This time I gave only
20 bucks to auto driver and appreciated him saying ‘Thanks chetta (brother),
you are romba (very) good’. I took my train to Mumbai. 6
years later I got to see Preetis wedding snaps though I couldn't manage to
attend the wedding itself! In the bride’s attire she looked like a gold mine
and was hardly left with any place to wear an extra ounce of gold. And now I
don't miss her exactly, instead the gold mine ;-)
Taking a long breathe after writing such
a lengthy one; I am signing off! Aloha folks! And yeah please leave your
comments below.
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